i feel like writing lyrics tonight.

If i had a beat i would write songs like this

i would tell you her story and remind you of his

i make women cry over loss in past and
spells they have yet, yet to cast

writing the words that make you feel the way you already do but just never knew

retelling your life through the eyes I've have oooonly viewed


like the spins you wished you'd spun like the bridges that you, you

yurn to burn

(insert chorus here)

[this is as far as i got before i lost the beat]



inspired by Iron and Wine's "boy with a coin" a much more beautiful song.

i am so self loathing.

Rachael is the best girlfriend i have ever had and is soooo good to me but when i dream i make her mean in my dreams. it doesn't stop there i make my roommate john mean, my parents mean.

this could be a real problem i need to be nicer to myself in my dreams and stop being mean via mockups of people i know in my heads twisted view of the world.

i can't dwell on this too long caus i got to get lots of stuff done today.


PS. Rachael made me feel really good this morning with a love text.


I love that girl.

man money sucks

i am soo tired of thinking about money and cars. i hate that the rest of my life will probably be like this. (well not really but at the moment it is all i can think about so i can't see the light at the end of the tunnel).

i have learned terms and ideas that i never thought i would need to hear like rebuilt title, rebuilt title insurance. i have been learning about what years cars changed there design and engine and which is better.

let me start over by saying this is all my fault i have built up this dream in my head of owning a particular car a Toyota Prius and i have got myself in to my own corner by telling everyone that i was going to buy this car. i know that no one is expecting me or putting any pressure on me to do so but i keep feeling like i have to do it. i am really tired of driving my motorcycle it is too cold and it just isn't worth it anymore. I am always freezing.

I am going to take a few days off thinking about cars and talking about cars and just relax.


i apologize to anyone who i got excited about me and a car.

i still plan to buy a car soon and most likely a prius or at least a hybrid but i just can't think about this anymore right now.

school = busy!!!

wow so i have soo much to do lately.

i have been putting together a proposal for the college about the Dixie Music Festival,
figuring out a schedule for the radio station,
figuring out how to get all my managers their scholarships,
fixing problems with my financial aide,
working at basketball games for the college as announcer for my sports broadcasting class,
doing homework lots of homework,
getting a show together,
attending meetings for the new student media councel,
drawing and redrawing comics for the school newspaper,


oh yah and i still have to work at Starbucks.


a few things have suffered because of this:

my diet has slipped for lack of time,
i don't get to listen to music very much anymore

and most important me an Rachael this is the one thing i will be making a better effort to correct.

step one: I asked for a few days off in February to go see her
step two: taking time everyday to call her
step three: Passing all classes so i can get out of this town and go be with her by graduating.


PS:

My leather jacket was stolen on Friday so the ride home from work was hard. John gave me his jacket to wear but if you know john his jacket is like 6 sizes to big so it let a lot of cold air in. i got home and wanted nothing more than to crawl into bed and press up against Rachael's warm body. In fact i miss that a lot coming home to Rachael made bad days not so bad.

hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Oh My God